A What Of Pathologists?
Recently I went to a drinks party at the Royal College of Pathology. Being pathologists, I'd kind of expected them to be in a damp, tiled basement lined with drain gulleys, serving Bloody Marys out of the chest cavities of opened-up cadavers, in soup ladles....
Instead to my surprise the organization occupies very spacious, swish premises at one of London's swankiest addresses, Carlton House Terrace. Good wines and scrummy canapés were served up by living waitresses, and the only cadaver in sight was a dead shark in a photograph - there for some reason I never did fathom out.
Photographs were very much the point of the event - twenty-three of them in fact, extraordinary portraits of some of the most eminent pathologists in the county, each a specialist in a different field.
Despite my having a very attractive female forensic pathologist in my Roy Grace novels, (inspired by an equally attractive real life one) the words photogenic and pathologist don't particularly go hand in hand not even when donning surgical latex gloves... But displayed on the wall was a total revelation. 23 quite striking images from a brilliant photographer, George Brooks (check out his website).
The exhibition is open to all - check out this link for more information. Well worth a visit just to learn about how much pathology is at the forefront of medicine today - and that forensic pathology, at the centre of so many crime dramas and novels today, is only a small part of that profession.
My favourite of the photos was one that managed to be both surreal and all-too-real at the same - Dr Ben Swift, consultant forensic pathologist - and advisor to the television series Silent Witness - standing in a suit in the middle of a lake, holding a human femur in his hand.
There were about 150 pathologists there last night, and a surprisingly jolly lot they were. I've long maintained that the best place to learn new jokes is a mortuary - and I can now add a cocktail party full of pathologists, to that. Although I formed the conclusion that it would not be a smart place to drop dead of a heart attack. You'd have been cut open and autopsied before the paramedics had even reached the building...
And one thing is now puzzling me - what would the collective noun for a group of pathologists be? An incision of pathologists? A d'eath of pathologists? All suggestions welcome - and a signed paperback of Looking Good Dead for the best answer posted!
29 Comments:
At 9:12 AM ,
Anonymous said...
Gee thats a hard one to get ones head around Peter!
A cleave of Pathologists
A Swag of Pathologists
Still thinking......
Linda
At 3:10 PM ,
L'Amour Fou said...
How about: POP
- a poke of....
- a pool of....
indeed
- a pack of pathologists!!!
At 4:28 PM ,
Anonymous said...
peter
the obvious answer is body....how about "an anatomy" of pathologists?
cheers,
robert parkinson
At 4:57 PM ,
Peter James said...
Some of these are great! I think "Cleave, Poke and Anatomy of pathologists are all very clever as they all relate to the work of the pathologist!
Look forward to some more...
Best
Peter
At 6:51 PM ,
L'amour Fou said...
Before dinner,
how about....
An accretion of....
- assemblage of.....
- conjunction of....
- conglomeration of...
or even....
- limbs of pathologists....?
At 3:31 PM ,
Fred Sinstead said...
How about a corrosion of...?
At 3:32 PM ,
Jo said...
... A carvery of pathologists
... A dig of pathologists
..this is fun and could go on forever!
At 5:33 PM ,
Graham said...
How about a splattering of pathologists?
By the way, you can find the collective nouns of all many of things at my website: http://users.tinyonline.co.uk/gswithenbank.
Thanks for the great reads.
At 5:36 PM ,
Graham said...
That's 'all MANNER of things'.
I really must learn to poofread
At 5:51 AM ,
Peter James said...
Here's one from mem, I'e just thought of (love some of the others and great inventive responses!!!)
"An eviscera of pathologists"
Peter J
At 9:12 AM ,
Annie said...
A Probe of pathologists?
At 11:00 AM ,
The Missus said...
A liaison of pathologists met
to discuss about a junction of the same kind and realised
that they were all a loop, a noose, a coil in fact a gin of the same kind after all.....
At 12:21 PM ,
Jo said...
Oh yeuchhhhhhhh ........ I just looked up eviscera and got a graphic description on a CSIRO site !!
At 7:10 AM ,
Anonymous said...
a cut of Pathologists
a body of.....
a dismember of......
a decompose of.....
a deviation of....
Linda
At 9:54 PM ,
Peter James said...
I like a "decompose" or rather would "a decomposition" of pathologists sound better???
Peter
At 8:55 AM ,
SHE again.... said...
A swarm of....
A maggot of....
A flock of....
A floccus of....
A mob of...
A swarf of...
A swaption of....
A skeleton of....
A skein of pathologists!!!!!
At 9:19 AM ,
Anonymous said...
The Royal College of Pathologists has tried hard to educate that "pathology" is not synonymous with "forensic pathology", nor even "histopathology". The photos to which you refer also included biochemists, microbiologists, haematologists etc. Forensic histopathology and forensic autopsy work is a small (but of course important) part of Pathology. My (unfunny) suggestion for a collective noun is therefore a College of Pathologists! Dr Peter Cowling
At 9:30 AM ,
M. said...
In this case, we speak about...
a meritocracy of...
or...
a clerisy of pathologists!
At 11:27 AM ,
Anonymous said...
OK. More, unfunny, defensive comments from me. All previous comments assume that pathology is about death and decomposition. In fact, 76% of all medical and surgical diagnoses are dependant on pathology results. That means 76% of all diagnoses would not be possible without the blood tests, microbiology tests and microscopic tissue examinations (biopsies etc)that pathologists carry out.The many branches of pathology are also intimately concerned with the management of diseases and tests of cure. Pathology is therefore much more about life than death. How about:
a celebration of pathologists?
a panacea of pathologists?
a close-shave of pathologists?
a second chance of pathologists?
a miracle of pathologists?
Dr Peter Cowling
At 11:37 AM ,
Jo said...
See we have education as well as fun here - what more could we ask for? :)
At 1:15 PM ,
She said...
Seems we are really dealing with
a chivalry of....
an ointment of....
a smasher of....
or
even a cream of pathologists!
M.
At 5:11 PM ,
Peter James said...
Hi Peter Cowling
I really like a Panacea of Pathologists - sort of sounds very slightly medical in a pancreas sort of way...
BTW I did in my blog make the point that pathology is not just about forensic medicine "The exhibition is open to all - check out this link for more information. Well worth a visit just to learn about how much pathology is at the forefront of medicine today - and that forensic pathology, at the centre of so many crime dramas and novels today, is only a small part of that profession."
Thanks for joining in this with such enthusiasm and creativity!
Best
Peter
At 7:34 PM ,
Anonymous said...
Dear Mr James, I am very sorry to have intruded on what, when all said and done, is a piece of good fun! I have decided that my nom de plume electronique should be Dr Kiljoy! I did read your blog carefully and I do know that you said all of those things. I apologise for inferring that you are not aware of the broad scope of Pathology. I really didn't mean that. However, as it is your job to entertain, it is my job to inform and I am simply piggy backing onto your blog in order to spread the message and dispose of some misconceptions. Perhaps I should have entered into the spirit a bit more and suggested that collective nouns should reflect the various disciplines of Pathology. A clot of Haematologists? A colony of Microbiologists? A spliff of Toxicologists? A cell of Cytologists? I and my colleagues yearn for the day when novels, films and TV begin to reflect some more of the complexity of reality. How about a plot in which a geneticist is the key forensic character, DNA profiling, ancestory of suspect and/or victim, possibility of DNA contamination. Good stuff I'll wager and not an Amanda Burton in sight! Best wishes from a limpet/bulldog of a pathologist, Peter
At 9:15 PM ,
Peter James said...
Dear Dr Cowling
Your intrusion is incredibly welcome, and I love your suggestions. A clot of haemotologists is quite inspired! But the purpose of my blogs is not just to have fun, but to have debate. I write my novels to entertain, but also to inform, and to make people think. Any intelligent contribution such as your extremely valuable posts, are greatly appreciated. So please continue to be Dr Killjoy - you have contributed views from which we all can learn - I cannot thank you enough for taking the time and trouble to participate, and hope you will continue to do so.
All very best
Peter James
At 11:37 PM ,
Neil Thompson said...
Hi Peter,
Hope I haven't missed the boat:
An abrasion of pathologists
A spleenful of pathologists
A bellyful of pathologists
A scrubbing of pathologists
Regards
Neil
At 8:26 AM ,
Peter James said...
Hi Neil
You have not missed the boat at all - the competition is still wide open and all to play for. Thanks very much for your great contributions!
Peter
At 12:23 PM ,
M. said...
A medley of...
a farrago,
a pastiche
a passticio of pathologists.
At 9:58 PM ,
Peter James said...
And I declare the winner to be Peter Cowling with "A panacea of pathologists"!
If you email me your snail mail address to peterj@pavilion.co.uk a signed copy of Looking Good Dead, not in any advanced state of decomposition, will wing its way to you! And thanks to everyone for the great, spirited entries!
At 4:54 AM ,
Jo said...
Congratulations Peter Cowling!
Now we can look forward to seeing 'A panacea of pathologists' used in a Roy Grace book in the near future! (We can, can't we?)
Post a Comment
Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]
<< Home